seduced him (I'm sure it didn't take much). His parents found out about it by reading his journal and are pressing charges. WHAT!??!! I’m not sure what is more hilarious, the fact that boy fooled around with an old lady or that he keeps a journal. I want you to picture a nerdy, 14-year-old boy telling me this story, his forehead covered with pimples while wearing an Old Navy t-shirt and skinny jeans. I can’t imagine how lonely and depressed I’d have to be to find a teenage, neighbor boy cute. I would need to be in a DEEP, dark place that even Girl Scout Cookies and make outs with ex-boyfriends couldn’t pull me out of. (I can’t imagine there being a place this dark, but I’m sure it must exist…for some people.)Since I’m a teacher, people always feel compelled to ask me questions like, “Do you ever find any of the boys you teach cute?” Really?! I feel insulted to even have to answer this question. First, what can a teenage boy offer me? I made-out with boys in high school and the memories aren’t anything that I’d like to relive. My high school make-outs are the basis for the definitions of the words AWKWARD, BUMBLING, and UNCOORDINATED. Second, I teach kids all day long. When I date someone, I’d like to be off duty. The reason why we all went through the awkward, bumbling, uncoordinated stages of making out was so we could learn how to do it properly. (I mean a variety of the things when I use the word properly. I’m not implying a hole-in-the-sheet missionary position here, though my granny would be pleased with that insinuation.) Lastly, is there anything less attractive than a teenage boy, especially a 14-year-old one?
Problems with teenage boys:
1. They remind me of a newborn giraffe trying to walk for the first time.
2. Most smell funky and are oily.
3. Their wallets only include a student id, a subway punch card, and a few crumpled dollar bills.
4. The coolest store they can think of is Spencer’s.
5. Peachfuzz on upper lips. Need I say more?
I would also like to note that this student of mine is a hero among his friends for the simple fact that he has lost is virginity to an older lady. He is not scarred and is way more popular now than he was before the incident or incidents. I’m sure you were all worried.
7 comments:
That 14 year old boy will be idealized for years by his peers.
And speaking from a slightly similar experience that wasn't public, there will be no emotional damage ;-)
Seriously! I am always SO offended when people ask if I was ever attracted to a teenage boy. I was barely attracted to teenage boys in HS - they are totally sebaceous and have a bizarre odor. After teaching HS, I call it the smell of "sweat and hormones." Ugh.
He might not be scarred, but the first girl who dates him might well be...
The real issue: women like this neighbor who are attracted to teenage boys are obviously emotionally or mentally disturbed. Or lost to a force so dark that I cannot begin to understand.
I don't know Betsy, the girl in the french maid outfit that "seduced" me did not seem to have a thing wrong with her...from my perspective anyway.
Students in Utah don't even get the glamor of subway punch cards. Sad
I have three metro cards in my wallet right now. Even sadder.
There was a teacher in my high school that had an affair with one of the sophomores and he was the creepiest, most unattractive kid, well, not EVER, but you know, top 5. I too don't understand the draw of the prepubescent.
So, you're saying you dig man with a real stash? Call me
I too was at first reluctant; but eventually my curiosity won out. What allure DID the boy next door hold? Tons it turned out.
I never ment to hurt you Birgie, but we are who we are born to be. I wish you all the best,
The X
Post a Comment