One of my first duties was to find a new math teacher to replace the one that the girls can't stand. So far I have interviewed three candidates, and let me say that high school Math teachers are probably the most difficult people for me to relate to. Last week there wa
s a prospect named Vishwanathe Harangaonker. I am not making this name up. He is from India and is working as an engineer here in the states. He claims that he would, “like to learn the girls how to computate Algebraic.” I'm not even sure what that means. I'd like to believe that he's just so smart that he's speaking nerdy math jargon, but I'm pretty sure it's just an example of the fact that English isn't his first or even his second language. Let me just say thatiIt's really hard to conduct a full interview when you know in the first two minutes that you're not going to hire them. I really wanted to just start asking really bizarre questions like, "Some of our girls have strange sexual cravings that they are trying to overcome. If one of the girls was to approach you with an outlandish request for FILL IN THE BLANK, what you say? Remember, we are trying to work on their self-esteem here, so you wouldn't want to shoot her down right off the bat."The second candidate was basically my grandfather, if he had decided to be a math teacher. He spoke so slowly that I thought I was going to have to miss lunch if he didn't wrap it up soon. I noticed that he had not only outlined a full page of questions for me, but he had also made note of the exact mileage to the school and the travel time it took him to get from his house to us. Girls that are in a residential treatment center for emotions issues would eat him alive...if they weren't automatically put to sleep by his elderly, melodic voice trying to describe math equations.
The interview yesterday was with a young lady with a severe ponytail pulled so tight that her eyes were a little squinty. She has only taught at small prep schools and has lived in Utah her whole life, which probably means she is a little too sheltered to teach our population. I think she may have cracked a smile once as she shook my hand to leave, but I couldn't be certain.
I seriously have no idea what I'm supposed to do. I have one more interview tomorrow and then I have to make a decision. I also just learned that I have to fire the old math teacher next week. This is why I shouldn't be allowed to have any real responsibilities. I'm no good at this sort of thing.
*** This should show you that I have nothing funny going on in my life. I just devoted a blog to the hiring of a math teacher. KILL ME....SOFTLY....PLEASE.
