(Yes, this is an actual family photo taken circa 1990)
The older I get, the more I appreciate my siblings. The middle child in my family, Ghent, has always been the quiet one. I’m not sure if this is in his nature, or if he was just terrorized into silence by our older brother. Anyway, Ghent has become one of the most hilarious people I know. Here are two examples of why I love him so much:
Somehow we got on the topic of rape. Everyone in the group was saying what they would do to avoid an attacker. My brother Ghent pipes up, “I’ve thought about this. I would just scream really loud and say, ‘Don’t, I have diarrhea!’”
My sister Laura had this roommate that was like a little cat in heat. She was a dance major and the sultriest little redhead you’ve ever met. Her name was Kimber, which was perfect for her. If you brought a boy over, you can bet she would be prancing around trying to get attention. I brought a date over once to meet my sister. In less than 20 minutes Kimber had stuck her boobs in his face about twelve times, gotten him water and snacks, and was curled up next to him on the other side of the couch. In fact, the next day she added my date on facebook and had written him some sexy message about how much she liked older men. (He was probably 15 years older than her) Anyway, my brother Ghent was sitting on the couch at Laura’s watching TV and Kimber came in and acted like she had just had catnip shoved up her nose. She curled up on the couch next to him and began flirting. Ghent, of course, just tried to ignore her. Kimber then upped her antics and got up, moved in-between Ghent and the TV, and proceeded to claim that her back and legs were soooo sore. She folded her body in half and shoved her butt right up in Ghent’s face for a couple of minutes while she stretched, cooed, and then sat back down next to him grinning. Ghent then said, “My turn,” and stands up and shoves his butt in Kimber’s face while making exaggerated ohhhhing and ahhhing stretching noises. Kimber was humiliated and left Gent alone to watch TV.
There are dozens of other great Ghent stories I could share, but I just wanted to give you a taste of why I love my brother so much.
PS- I forgot to share the one that happened a week ago. I asked my brother if he could help me move and he showed up with a truck and two day-laborers he grabbed from Home Depot because he said he didn’t want it to take too long. I tried to remind him that I was only moving my stuff across the street, but he just shrugged.
