Here Comes the Bride........reluctantly

Do you know how shocked we all were when Brittany Spears went crazy? Okay, I wasn’t that surprised about her going crazy. What astounded me was that Brittany went SO nuts that she made Kevin Federline look like the normal one in the relationship. That is kind of what happened at my dad’s wedding this past weekend.

Tanna, the bride, fainted before the ceremony backstage, causing the whole thing to start about 25 minutes late. Finally, it got underway, though Tanna couldn’t seem to stop crying. The man officiating/priest asked them the final question. My dad said “yes” and then it was Tanna’s turn. She was crying so hard that she couldn’t speak. The priest then asked again….long pause. She barely managed to squeak out a “yes,” but it felt like she wanted to say no. As everyone left the room in the church, Tanna clutched family members and friends sobbing.

We waited outside the church while she touched up her make-up and hair…for a FULL HOUR! When she finally emerged with my dad, she looked like someone had lit her house on fire right in front of her. She was shaking like a Chihuahua left in the backyard overnight. It was so pitiful to watch. I tried to hug her and welcome her to the family, but I don’t think it helped.

We went to the reception and she looked much calmer by the time she got there. I hope the Zanex had kicked in by then. All the while, my dad was shaking hands, giving speeches, graciously accepting congratulations, and hugging everyone. He looked so normal. It was amazing to see the transformation in the dynamic.

Sidenote: Luckily, my brother and sisters chose to sit in a table in the rear of the reception hall. The piano player was from Tanna’s congregation and regaled us with such tunes as “We’ve Only Just Begun”, “Lady” by Kenny Rogers, “You’re the Inspiration”, “I Want to Know What Love Is”, and “Feels Like Heaven”. It was like the movie The Wedding Singer. We had to eat and try not to look at each other or we'd break out laughing and snorting.

PS- My friend Eric said that Tanna was just afraid that my dad was going to "drop the hammer" later that night. I asked him to please NEVER refer to my dad's member as "the hammer".